Security is the main ingredient of healthy relationships. You need healthy relationships with others in order to fulfill the call God has placed on your life. As a Kids Ministry Leader, your goal is to raise up others to join you in the vision of raising the next generation of life-long followers of Christ. If you are not secure in who you are and who God has created you to be, you will (consciously or not) poison your relationships with the people God puts around you.
My pastor, Rod Loy, challenges our entire team to evaluate whether or not we are Secure or Insecure Leaders. Here is part of a grid he provided for us:
Insecure Leader – when someone else succeeds, they divert credit to themselves
Secure Leader – gives credit away to others.
Insecure Leader – surrounds themselves with weaker people because they have an inner need to be adored
Secure Leader – is comfortable with the strengths of others and surround themselves with strong leaders
Insecure Leader – when evaluating themselves, they only see weaknesses
Secure Leader – they know their weaknesses exist, but they are not crippled by them
Insecure Leader – evaluate by "how do I compare to others?"
Secure Leader – evaluate themselves by “how am I doing right now?”
Insecure Leader – can’t laugh at themselves
Secure Leader – laugh at their mistakes, seeing them as another opportunity to learn
Insecure Leader – resists evaluation (they have inextricably connected their performance with their self-worth)
Secure Leader – embraces evaluation as an opportunity to grow
Insecure Leader – they are very hard on others who make mistakes
Secure Leader – more patient with other people and with their growth process
Insecure Leader – may enjoy success for a season
Secure Leader – will enjoy success for a lifetime
Insecure Leader – says "Blessings are to be enjoyed by me!"
Secure Leader – asks "How many blessings can I share?"
Insecure Leader – produces insecure followers
Secure Leader – produces other secure leaders
So, are you a Secure Leader or an Insecure Leader? It's not too late to change course:
1) Learn to see yourself the way God sees you.
2) Hang around secure leaders and friends.
3) Recognize when reactions are based on insecurity. Retrain yourself away from those reactions.
4) Ask God to help you become more secure in Him so that you can build a team of Secure Leaders to help you reach this generation and advance the cause of Christ!
The more secure you are, the better leader you will be.